I wish my dog was allowed to be inside. I want to cuddle and smooch on her so bad right now. I hate my step dad for not allowing her to be an inside dog since we got her. I mean she has been an outside dog for maybe 7 years? We tried bringing her in at night during one of the cold snow storms but she would not go in her crate she struggled so hard and ran for the door. It was a disaster and it made me cry because I wanted her to be inside so bad.It breaks my heart it really does but it has never been my decision to make. She is an independent pup and one with nature. It just isn’t fair she could have went to a home that would have been better. I just hate it.. My mom always wants another dog but I don’t think it is necessary especially when you have one that you keep outside. It infuriates me because I take care of her, feed her, clean her, make sure she gets lots of kisses and love. I love that dog and I am so helpless when it comes to her. I can’t even write this and not start to cry. I just love that dog so much. I just hope she knows that I love her bunches. My little Cali girl <3
Day off tomorrow. Don’t have anything planned besides the usually get my paycheck, go to the bank and then whatever else I decide to do. I seriously hate having weekdays off and no one to spend them with. I feel pretty fucking lonely these days. I’m okay with being alone but the lonely is the part I can’t handle.
I set up a little art station at my desk so I can get some work done. It’s better than being downstairs doing it. I feel at ease when I can create work in my own space alone with no distractions, it’s nice. So at least I have that going on.
Hopefully tomorrow is nice. I’ll most likely do the jump rope thing and maybe take my pup Cali for a little walk. We will see how that goes if I decide to do so. I usually take her for walks out back but it is still muddy so I’m not sure how she will do on a road with cars (it’s a “country” road so it’s not heavy with traffic) but we shall see. She is a good pup and listens to me mostly so I doubt I will have any issues with her. Gosh I love that dog.
Anyway.. I’m rambling as usual. Most likely passing out soon because I have nothing better to do.
"She loved three things — a joke, a glass of wine, and a handsome man."
Doctor Who Animation - 50 Years in Time and Space (Richard Swarbrick)
Another one of those days.
I just dont want to go to work. I know I gotta.. I just dont wanna!
Totally not okay with being single tonight. I can usually handle it pretty well but I really need cuddles. I am just feeling super emotional tonight. Oh well.
I have too much on my mind and none of it is good. I worry a lot about my future and I need to just realize that I am doing my best right now to make sure everything works out for me. It’s hard. I feel as if I have let myself down when in reality I have done the best I could do and continue to do so.
Someone just come cuddle and take my mind off of all this.
"Date someone who would rather watch your favorite movie with you then go to a party on Friday night. Date someone who will share their food with you even though you said you didn’t want any. Date someone who will warm your hands in the winter and kiss your pink nose. Date someone who will text you they love you at 2am and at 9pm. Date someone who will let you change the station in the car when they’re driving. Date someone who can make you smile when you would rather die. Date someone who makes your insides feel like you’ve just downed a bottle of vodka. Date someone who makes you better."
Lmao. I love yo!